i really miss the sound of birds chirping.

you & i embrace surrender

All we are
And all we have
Is all a gift from God that we receive
Brought to life
We open up our eyes
To see the majesty and glory of the King

He has filled our hearts with wonder
So that we always remember

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see who we were meant to be

Shakespeare doth say...

"Journeys end in lovers meeting,
Every wise man's son doth know."

Twelfth Night (II, iii, 44-45)

queen victoria

i've been fascinated by queen victoria since i visited england as a tween. now, as i watch "the young victoria", i find myself even more intrigued by her.

my fascination began when i learned that her husband was called "prince albert" rather than "king albert". i begged my parents for an explanation, and eventually received one. however, in contrast to the typical cessation of interest upon the receipt of a suitable answer, my interest was aroused.

one day we passed prince albert hall at hyde park. the image of that beautiful building will forever be in my mind.

i became enamored with the concept of monarchies (and no doubt, this spurred my interest in history in general). my father told me about victoria's many

children and that most of europe was related to her. in fact, most royal families stem from queen victoria (the realist in me forces me to add that monarchies are to blame for the continued cases of hemophilia...)

another day we toured a collection of queen victoria's gowns, her carriage, her children's clothes. (i had never realized how beautiful clothes could be.) i was also stunned to discover that after prince albert died, she only wore black. she remained in mourning garb till her own death. when he died at 42, victoria had his clothes layed out every day until her death...40 years later.

victoria & albert inspired me not only because theirs was a beautiful story of love and dedication, but also because together they caused many good things to happen in england. they worked together--unlike many consorts and royalty--to promote positive changes in their beloved country.

victoria inspired me because she was the youngest to become a monarch and maintains the record as the longest reign of any british monarch, but she also had the longest reign of any female in history.

she began as a monarch who seemed doomed to fail, but obviously...she surprised everyone.

sing it, amos lee, sing it so sweet.

Lately I, I've been heading for a breakdown
Every time I leave my house
It feels just like a shake down
Between street sweepers and a bunch of the lawyers
Who may as well be butchered
Between the small timing hustlers who all seem to feed upon each other

Oh God where have you been
Hanging out a little violin
While I've been waiting for you to pull me through

Lately I, every time I try to lie down
My mind just gets away
I can't even close my eyes now
Between the big fish ambition, and the lovers
Using words as ammunition
Between war plan I've been pacing endlessness
Impossible dream that I've been chasing

Oh God where have you been
Hanging out a little violin
While I've been waiting for you to pull me through

just forget about it (a song i've been thinking about all evening)

Forget about it
I'm admittin' I was wrong
And I'll just take what's mine
And broken right out the door

Forget about it
I'll split and I'll be gone
And you'll have memories
You'll find hard to ignore

'Cause after all
I'll see you sometime
Maybe when I can't recall
How you drove me crazier

Forget about it
When forever's over
I won't remember how much
I loved you anymore

Forget about it
Put me out of your head
Now that you're free and easy
Out there on the town

Forget about it
When you're lying in bed just wishing
I was there to lay you down

'Cause after all
I'll see you sometime maybe
When you will recall
How I drove you crazier

Forget about those starlit nights
Laying by the fireside
Holding you tight
I can't remember when I felt so right
So just forget about it

Forget about it
When you see me on the street
Don't wink, don't wave
Don't try to tease me with your smile

Forget about it
If we chance to meet somewhere
Don't think it's cause I'm trying to reconcile

'Cause after all
I'll see you sometime maybe
When I can't recall
How you drove me crazier

Forget about those starlit nights
Laying by the fireside
Holding you tight
I can't remember when I felt so right
So just forget about it

a night of depressing posts.

good times for a change...

seen the luck i've had, can make a good man turn bad

so please, please, please, let me, let me, let me,

let me get what i want this time.

haven't had a dream in a long time.

seen the life i've had can make a good man bad

so for once in my life, let me get what i want.

lord knows it would be the first time.

lord knows it would be the first time.

Rarely have I felt as stupid as I feel (nearly daily) in my grad program. I know I'm not a stupid person, but I feel like it...most of the time.

I think it's the early semester blues...I'm looking at the next 13 1/2 weeks of my semester, and just feel overwhelmed and inadequate. I'm confident that this is something that will pass, but my Lord, it's terrifying.

And after this semester comes a new summer semester in Seattle...and then a return to my last (aka second) year in Boston for 2 more (technically 3) semesters to finish...

I'm trying to enjoy every day of my program, but right now...I feel burdened. So if you think of me, dear friends, please pray.

Gracias :)

he's listening (agreed, chauncey)

over the past two days, every time i've logged in to blog, i've seen chauncey's most recent post title "He's listening". and i have to say, chauncey, i agree.

i realized that God has indeed been listening to me. not necessarily to my voice, but to my heart's cries. to the unvoiced thoughts.

how has He listened? i'm surrounded by a wonderful community of my sister-in-law, brothers and new friends, even across the nation from my "home". not only this, but one of my closest friends is moving to boston. moving... moving! at a time when i need community and comfort most, He's sent me the people i need to make it through.

right now i'm thinking that i'm in the palm of His hand.

"...faith can see right through the circumstance, sees the forest in spite of the trees..."

a new beginning.

though last semester was quite busy throughout, the end was undoubtedly the most stressful.

this semester is in sharp contrast, however, since it is the first eight weeks that are going to be intensely busy, stressful and frustrating. i will have the bulk of my 18 semester credits, way too many weekly meetings, a client, assignments and a few quizzes here and there... but the last part of my semester will be sheer heaven...i'll barely have any classes, just a few quizzes, a few assignments, and only a couple finals.

once march 11 arrives, i will be a free bird (relatively). oh, march 11! come quickly.

why i love right now.

Many people hate winter and complain about how it gets dark so early at this time of year. Yet this has to be one of my favorite times of the year. You may ask why...I'll tell you (of course).

This time of year is a favorite because we are past the shortest day of the year...which means that our days are gradually growing longer...it may still get dark rather early, but as each day comes and passes, it grows longer and longer.

"But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines, it will shine out the clearer."

And the sun will shine out the clearer...

also...

obviously these are not all the east coast escapades of a transplanted washingtonian. more like the ramblings of a crazy person from washington. i apologize for misleading you, but hope you enjoy my sporadic attempts to entertain via the interweb.

are you in need of a gift for charlotte?

In case you've ever been in such a predicament, I have your answer! Buy me a gift card to Anthropologie. I'm obsessed, and I'm not sure it's healthy. But, please, feed my habit.

seattle starbucks let me down.

not only did they forget to make my drink, they made an entirely different drink once they remembered! i expect boston starbucks to mess up, but not the downtown starbucks with the walk-up window. a sad day when boston makes better coffee than seattle!

a hint....

i will be sitting in a place with booths near the international students approximately 2pm this tuesday. come find me.